I wonder where you sit upon the following issue.
Some of my friends and family take great umbrage that I am not on Whatsapp. They say to me, "I could stay in touch with you better if you were on Whatsapp. I could send you photos and regular messages."
My archaic phone, once upon a time, DID have Whatsapp but as is the way, they send you a message saying that "This operating system will stop supporting Whatsapp by blah blah a date."
I've therefore not had Whatsapp for a couple of years.
When making plans, I always want to phone the person and speak to them about making plans, whereas it seems the norm for everyone else, even when only one or two people are involved is to do it on Whatsapp.
I get that Whatsapp is useful for making group plans, e.g. a music group, a family who wants to get together, meaning that everyone gets the message at the same time, but is it stopping us from talking? Is it causing procrastination? Is it stopping us from committing to something in the moment and trying to give us an 'escape clause?' from having to socialise?
I do like reading CBC's Whatsapp chats from his family and it is a great way to share photos. But is it a place for meaningful communication?
Do we even want meaningful communication or do we prefer surface level conversation?
I know there have been bullying incidents in school from Whatsapp and other group communication apps.
I've spoken to several friends and family and they say, "I prefer to send people a Whatsapp (or text) so I don't disturb them." and "I rarely phone people now." when catching up with someone.
But when did we start worrying about 'disturbing' our friends? Surely, if they are friends, we can say, "Oh sorry, it's not a good time," and no one will object?
The trouble is, Whatsapp needs you to have a Data/Wifi connection, to have your phone close-by, ready to look at any moment for this to happen.
Also, you can't rely on everyone getting the message in time or replying in time, thus resulting in hanging around for a reply. I prefer to phone because I will then get an instant answer or at least know the person is more likely to hear the phone and give me an answer.
Take the case of Sunday. CBC and his brother were communicating by Whatsapp about meeting for a walk. Everyone was being a bit lazy about getting up and CBC said, "I don't think it's going to happen." He therefore took a leisurely approach to the morning.
All of sudden, he said, "Ahrgh, T is on a train to x!". T had sent a Whatsapp saying he was on his way out to Essex and CBC had gone downstairs, made himself coffee, breakfast, was ironing shirts for school. A frantic scramble ensued because T had assumed CBC was at the end of the phone.
Is Whatsapp a lazy way to stay in touch? You don't really have to engage with the person properly to use it? Or do you?
It seems useful for example because my sister and I hardly talk anymore because she is always busy boxing, running, working, looking after my niece and I've stopped trying to phone so much because it feels like I never choose a good time to call? Would it be worth getting Whatsapp to at least have a regular way of communication with her? That said, I miss our chats on the phone we used to have.
Over to you? How do you feel about this?
x
Sunday, February 23, 2020
14 comments:
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I started using WhatsApp last year. I'm in a few church related groups and it does help with communicating information. It's also useful for family - during the working day I can send messages to my daughters without disturbing them. But we also use WhatsApp to arrange phone/video chats. But I love 'proper' chats on the phone best.
ReplyDeleteI have never even heart of this! I use email. I don't have a phone!
ReplyDeleteIf people want to communicate, they can use conventional means (like the telephone). If they want to communicate by alternate means, they can propose it but not demand it. Stick to your guns.
ReplyDeleteI think if you are doing alright without it you should stay without it! You are person who likes to talk on the phone or in person -- you don't really like WhatsApp-style "conversation," so even with your sister, it probably wouldn't be satisfying to be in more frequent contact with her.
ReplyDeleteThat's my two cents, because you asked. I often envy people like you. But I don't like making phone calls, so I appreciate the convenience of messaging. I do still talk on the phone quite a bit, and often am thankful for people like you who will just phone and get the arrangements for a get-together made much faster! Of course, face-to-face conversations are my favorite above all!
I didn't have WhatsApp for ages (couldn't get it on my old phone) and I never heard from my sister! Now she messages occasionally. It's also useful for the group chats - I can just send one message and get it to my mum and siblings all at the same time.
ReplyDeleteMy dad actually uses the "call" feature on WhatsApp to phone me. It's free if you're on WiFi whereas an actual phone call to my Swiss mobile or landline would be quite expensive.
Interesting one, I do have, but rarely use, WhatsApp, but I much prefer it to speaking on the phone. I wouldn't phone anyone unless it was an emergency, some kind of text based message let's people get back to me at their convenience.
ReplyDeleteHaving said that, if the technology I owned didn't support it, and I was happy with that then I wouldn't force myself to upgrade just to make other people happy. If I did start to feel adrift from loved ones I'd probably have to question my reasons for not embracing the conventional way of doing things.
I'm with Sheila, I don't have a phone either! Jon uses WhatsApp, he says it's a cheap way to stay in touch. x
ReplyDeleteI do use What'sApp to message some people, and I agree that it can be useful to create a group chat in some situations. I understand that it is a lot less expensive to send photos and make calls abroad via What'sApp, so I can see that in some situations it can be useful. I agree that it probably is a very lazy way to communicate, but I too don't like phoning people in case it's inconvenient. I don't always find communication via What's Ap is as satisfying as face to face communication though, as you can tell so much more from body language and facial expression than from messages on an app. I guess I use it because some friends, OH and my daughter use it, so it's a convenient way to contact them as they check it regularly. If your phone won't support it, I wouldn't feel compelled to get another one to be able to use it. I think people need to be more flexible and not impose their choice of apps on others.
ReplyDeleteI have Whatsapp but decline invitations to be in more groups than those i am now in: one big one, two small opnes, and our family one which we rarely use, being all still here and speaking mostly to each other most days. This year I am making a concerted effort to ring rather than message, and meet up more in person, as I feel that we are becoming increasingly disconnected, and thus frustrated and lonely without understanding why.
ReplyDeleteI do use Whatsapp, but usually not as a group app for making plans Etc. I mainly use it as it's easy to send pictures. And yes, I sometimes find it easier sending a text or a Whatsapp message, rather than speaking on the phone. I've never been good with speaking on the phone, possibly because we never had a phone when I still lived with my parents. I only got a phone when I was well into my twenties. So I never really got into the habit of calling people on a regular basis. xxx
ReplyDeleteI sometimes wish I didn't have Whatsapp to be completely honest, but I have to because of work. I think your concerns are very valid. Sometimes people use it as an excuse, an escape button of sorts. They can always say they didn't see something. When someone calls you, the answer has to be more definite. With Viber/Whatsapp it is all very informal and it is possible that it sometimes influenced our behaviour in a negative way. I noticed bullying in Whatsapp groups too, I mean I heard kids arguing about it.
ReplyDeleteI agree having a WhatsApp for group chat in certain situations holds worth as the information is passed to all, don’t have to waste time sending a message or reply individually. Now technology has taken over the human and no one cares for another’s. I understand that its a lot more inexpensive to send photos and make calls abroad, finding it useful in some situations. But in the end, it's our choice whether to have one or not. Take care!!! Be the artist of your LIFE.
ReplyDeleteI have to admit that I hate talking on the phone. Andy and my Mum are the only people I speak to on the phone easily, maybe my brother very occasionally.
ReplyDeleteI use WhatsApp for group conversations as i do find it easy. Or I use Facetime to keep in touch with my sister in law as it's nicer than talking on the phone.
But you're right, it is lazy, and it's not as meaningful. I guess I prefer to makes plans and then do my talking face to face.
xx
I've been using WhatsApp for a few years now. It is helpful to be in community groups as communication is easier. It is easier that way and its amazing to see how trends are changing.
ReplyDelete