So many tasks, so little time to do them...

I'm reaching mid-point of week 3 of my placement, and can't quite believe it has gone so quickly and I have soooo much to do still!

I'm finding it quite hard to get the majority of my directed tasks done. I have taught 3 linked English sessions to a small group which is fine, and now out of the way. I was observed by my college tutor and it went quite well, with some good food for thought. She made me re-order my folder quite a bit though. She's coming back this Friday to watch me do some whole class maths. I am scared! Basically, today, I took my first mental/oral starter. It was on Factor-pairs, and it went ok-ish, but I felt there was still a bit of confusion and I was not clear enough. Though when we set them off thinking about creating a word problem involving the factor pairs, they performed to the challenge really well, and it was lovely to talk to some of those who would not usually participate voluntarily so much in class, and be able to say "FAB! You must tell the class!". Also, I am not sure how good my discipline is. I was also hoping to teach my small group (one of my directed tasks is to teach a small group for maths three connected sessions), which I had planned for. However, we didn't actually get to the individual activities. So, I missed that opportunity. Still, I thought, I have two days, and hopefully could do the rest on Friday after my main-observation. However, then we're probably not having maths tomorrow, because of a performance we have in the afternoon, so that's a write-off. Then, we may not be having it on Thursday for another reason, and then it's Friday. And I only have a week left to do all my directed tasks.

Oh, and then there's the child literacy study in KS1. Well, I am supposed to do informal reading, observing Literacy, doing Reading conference, writing conference, running reading record, writing miscue. I should have been doing this every week. I did the observation and informal reading with my child the first week, and then she didn't come to school for the last week because she was ill. So on Monday I thought, "Ok, I am going to have to see if she is there, and then choose another child. And she was away, so I chose another child instead and just went straight in and did my reading conference with her on Monday. I went back today, and lo and behold, she is now off sick and my first child is back! AHRGH!!!!!!

BMI tasks, just have not even happened. Music teacher was off sick for 2 weeks, so I didnt see any music. She's now back, but my class wont have it tomorrow because of the performance. I meant to watch Yr1 this afternoon, but it clashed with my teaching science so I missed that.
The Science lesson went well today. I enjoyed it and I think and hope that the kids did too, and now they know the massive difference in size between the Sun, Moon and Earth.

I had to help supervise Infant art-club this evening with a lovely parent. Oh my! They are crazy! One child said to me: "Stop being so strict" - and "You can't tell me off" as I was trying to stop his mad escapades. We had to send it home in the end which was horrible, but we really couldn't not work with him there as he was just wild. It didn't help that he did not know us too well, so there was not much we could do.

All in all, it's a bit mad.
It would be an understatement to say I am finding it hard. But when I actually get to teach and do group work, it's fab. It's just all the horrid directed tasks, which are just so hard to do. I am still not sure all the time, that I will be able to get through it, but I am hoping and praying.

Summary of last week (can I think of a title? No!)

I taught my first whole class bits of lessons last week. 15mins on PSCHE on Thursday. Went ok, my class teacher wasn't there, but the lovely Supply teacher said she thought it was good so that was ok. I then inadvertantly supervised the two 20min ICT lessons on Thursday afternoon (as you can only have half the class at a time.) First half was fine, but second half I had the problem child (he can be so nice) and I didn't send him back to the classroom for talking too much so it was a bit of a nightmare.
Friday, I taught RE in the afternoon for 1/2 an hour (planned at lunchtime) as my teacher needed to observe me doing something. It was sooooooooooooooo scary. I just felt it went awfully. Oh, and my voice gave out at the end. Hmmmm. My teacher briefly said she thought it went well, but we haven't fully gone through it yet. I do have to keep remembering that I am a trainee and so things aren't going to be brilliant at the start.

It was a bit of a manic week, and I am rather tired, but at least I survived it. Am wondering how on earth I am going to do it all day every day in the summer. Also really dreading going back to school tomorrow, and wishing I could be just doing some sort of job that doesn't involve thinking, but I know that's just the fear emerging. Am I the only one who has permanent PGCE depression or is this something all trainee teachers go through? I am sure it's most people!

Last night, I took part in a recital at church in aid of Tearfund. It was lovely, and considering the shocking lack of practice I did for it, it actually went really well. As per usual, I avoided the famous composers and did some more unusual stuff! It was a real privilege to take part with such amazing performers. Plus there was lots of cake, which is always good.

Ok, I am putting off my writeups, so I had better get on with it.

A moment of beauty

I admit I have been feeling restless, aimless, listless and so on for the last couple of weeks or so, in my everyday life, in my prayers, I've been a bit lost and separate, and I haven't been able to function properly, it's not something I could really put into words and I have been feeling a bit gloomy about it. During church service today, I was feeling somewhat the same, though as we sang 'Light of the World, Here I am to worship' and 'O Lord hear my prayer' I felt a sense of peace and a feeling that I should go to the park after church. So duly, I walked towards the park with a sense of lightness in my step, singing 'here I am to worship'. As I walked through the park, I felt an overwashing of peace, of relief, of safety, of unspeakable joy as I surveyed all the beauty of creation. As I walked, it grew and I breathed, like I haven't breathed in weeks. As I stood on the bridge and basked in the beauteous sunshine, I felt loved and content. As I walked off the bridge, I stopped. I stood silently, then looked up into the sky. And there in my direct eye line was a white cross. Two planes had seemingly passed through each other's flight paths perfectly perpendicularly- I stared at it in awe. And as I looked, and the planes continued their journey, making the cross ever larger across the sky, a small white bird flew across the sky through the cross, I watched it before it disappeared behind the trees. And I looked back to the cross, which was growing ever greater, the planes were out of sight and it filled the sky...

Of his kingdom there will be no end.

As I walked towards the gate, I glanced back to the cross which though it had moved across the sky, remained constant and steady. The sky was full of all sorts of clouds, great and small, those gleaming with sunshine.

How glorious is your name over all the Earth.

Purrfect

Play with the kitty!

Back to school...

I start at my school placement for four weeks as of Monday. We spent last Monday there as a visit day. I must say I am very excited about my school placement, it's a lovely lovely school and the staff are amazing, my mentor is fab as is my class teacher. I am with Year 5. It's an unusual school, in that it is open plan. My classroom is possibly the smallest classroom I have ever seen- it's not big enough to swing a cat (sorry Connor, not suggesting that I would swing you or any of your esteemed colleagues), but on the plus side, the kids don't really roam about, they aren't too noisy and it's cosy. They are trying to get a new building though, so hopefully at some point, there wont be the problem. Again as in my Observation school, it's one form entry. The coolest thing is, that my class learn French! Oh, and every child is allowed instrumental lessons, and there are loads of art projects going on.
The class love reading. They were given half an hour to read their books after lunch and I was watching and all were engrossed except for two boys who tried to distract each other. I can't wait to talk to them about why they like reading and what they like (tips for recommending books for my future classes). They are slightly mad in a lovely way too!
However, recently I was feeling a bit overwhelmed by everything I am going to have to do in these weeks, though I realise that there is no point in getting worried about it, and having fear. I have been watching one of my favourite films tonight, The Princess Diaries and Mia is fearful about being a Princess and she is going to refuse the title. But then she reads a letter written by her father to her before he died:

"Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the judgment that something is more important than fear. The brave may not live forever but the cautious do not live at all. From now on, you'll be travelling the road between who you think you are and who you can be. The key is to allow yourself to make the journey".

from Princess Diaries, (Disney film) from the books by Meg Cabot

I think that is very valuable advice. It's no use getting bogged down in things, but to trust that it will be ok, get on with it, and know that the end is more important than that which we fear. Hurrah for Monday and hurrah for new teaching placements!

The day of three rainbows...

It was a really gloomy day at primary school. We had been doing some rather uninteresting work and it had been raining all day. But then as we were coming out of school the sun had made his welcome appearance in the sky. And the sky was illuminated with not one, not two, but THREE rainbows, there was even the inkling of a fourth. They were all parallel with space between them in the sky. The first was the brightest rainbow I ever did see, the second was a little paler but still brighter than most rainbows you see, the third was like a normal rainbow and the fourth was a slight teasing on the horizon. I remember being filled with absolute delight and awe. Had I come out a bit earlier or later, I would not have seen them. But they brightened up that day in a magical and unforgettable way...

Fast forward 15 years and here I am at University. We were studying 'light' in this afternoon's science session and looking at what would be appropriate to do with primary children and starting points for science lessons. It was extremely informative. We got onto the subject of rainbows and how we might explain to a primary child about rainbows. Refraction isn't actually in the primary National Curriculum and it would be inappropriate to go into it in too much technical detail (can be an extension activity), but if a child asks you (like occured with a grown-up 'child' in our lecture!) about how they are made, what would you say? In our group, we decided:

What is the weather like when you've seen a rainbow? (coax them towards rain and sun if not forthcoming). We need certain conditions to produce a rainbow. If you look at a drop of water (may want to demonstrate) it actually looks like a beautiful crystal (I have sat mesmorised watching small droplets of water drip of my fingers) and if the sun shines in a specific direction through the rainbow, the rain does something to the light and produces a rainbow. It can only happen if the light hits the raindrop at a very special specific angle, so that's why we don't always see rainbows and they are such special and rare things. It was something along those lines, but we hoped it had given a fair idea (if it came up) but not too much to confuse?

The main point of this blog was to say, that I haven't seen a rainbow for years, I might even offer a decade per chance. Is it because there aren't so many, because London has become so pollutedor because I have lost my childhood eyes of delighting in this wonderful phenomenom? Where can I see a rainbow again? I really would like to...

*Photo provided by the exceedingly wonderful Freefoto.com

The Magic ruler!

There’s one (may appear rather shallow it has to be said) common bond (aside from all the obvious education links!!!) between children and those returning to education. The joy of new stationary! Aside from my selection of beautiful floral, rainbows and patterned folders, there’s the magic ruler. Courtesy of Tescos, it’s the loveliest ruler ever! It’s 30cm/12 inches of concertina-ed rainbow! With two way hinges, it folds into 12 pieces- either
exhibiting even or odd numbers depending which way you fold it. It can be bended, wafted, rolled up, folded in various ways, and is in 6 attractive bright shades! Only troubles is, I find myself occasionally distracted by it. One of my fellow Peeg students (lovely lovely lady) today, absentmindedly (I could tell from the glazed facial expression! I am quite sure I wear the same expression when mesmerised by said ruler) grabbed it during our lecture/lesson and was totally concentrating on it for several minutes, intent upon folding it into specific shapes. It made me smile. And the ruler has been admired much. It’s hilarious!

Stationary envy ensues. Like a sheep, I now really want a stripy pukka pad.

(Thankyou Freefoto.com !)