I am generally quite rubbish at blogging, but I have always seemed to feel the need to herald the end of term with some summarising post, so here I am.
At the end of last year, I felt great relief at having reached the end of a rather miserable NQT (Newly qualfied teacher) year. By the end I felt more able to cope with the constant demands of a teaching career, although still not 100%. At the end of my second year, how have things changed? Well, everyone who said it is easier second time round is certainly right, teaching lessons a second time, adapted or otherwise has proved much easier, and has helped me consolidate and feel better about things that seemed awful last time. Some things have worked better, others not so, but in general, things have been better. I have been able to do things in more creative ways, and better ways, e.g. in science, I have given my kids more opportunities to do investigative work, although I still need to work on my teaching/managing technique during science.
In terms of classes, I am glad that I started off with the horror class in my first year, as this class were lovely by comparison. They had their issues of course, but I am grateful to them for restoring my belief in my abilities to manage a class and the fact that classes don't have to have disputes and need to be separated from certain children. It might have been a different story had I had the horrors after a nice class. They really were a nice class all in all, and I am glad I didn't have the other year 5 class!
Also, I was dreading working with my parallel year group partner at the beginning of last year, because she a) deputy head b) is very forthright and I always thought she seemed scary, but I have enjoyed working with her. She has a good heart, is funny, kind and and she has been a good influence on me in terms of getting me not to stress so much and relax a bit more, i.e. redressing the work/life balance. AND, she makes me feel organised at times!!!!!
In addition, I have of course come out of class for 2 days a week since January in order to teach music. This has been excellent and beneficial in several respects. Firstly, teaching music, despite impacting on my having to plan more, has meant I have two days a week without the marking, which really really really has helped me to feel happier and less swamped. Secondly, it has helped me in terms of professional development, e.g. letting me be music coordinator (unofficially and unnumerated at present, but with the responsibility), working with all year groups from Nursery to year 6 thus preparing me for the time when I am moved out of year 5 so it wont feel such a shock. Surprisingly, I have loved working with Reception and Nursery. Thirdly, also helping my professional development, it has allowed me to enrol upon the LSO On track course for primary music teachers. This has been fun, I have learnt loads, made some great contacts and I have been able to implement the ideas I have attained into my teaching. Fourthly, I have been able to teach something I love- I love music, and I love enthusing others about it. Fifthly, it has meant I have worked with a job share in my classroom. J, the lady who has taken my class when I am not there, is a lovely lady, who has helped me again to chill a bit, has taken over maths planning so I only had to plan for Literacy, again impacting on my preparation time and has really nurtured my class's art talent. She is a brilliant teacher and again, I have learnt from her.
Also, I have had to take on additional responsibilities this year through music, such as taking Singing Assembly every week. I have really enjoyed doing this, and I KNOW that (most of) the children enjoy the way I do it, because they tell me, which they didn't used to do so much. And because I have done something successfully, which staff have praised me for, that has raised my self-esteem which again impacts on my general well-being and happiness. Also, I have taken choir (crucially helped by a wonderful TA who takes it when I have meetings!) which I have enjoyed and I have enjoyed teaching a variety of songs, including Mozart, Russian folksongs and making it more interesting with percussion etc. I have also accompanied orchestra, which is taken by one of my previous music teachers from our music service which has been fun, and helped me to learn. Of course, this then led to my organising the school concert, which went fabulously, so thus again, helping my self-esteem. I know you shouldn't have to be good at everything you do in order to be happy, but I think one thing that has really hampered me since being a teacher is the fact that I felt so woefully inadequate the whole time. I know that I am of course still learning and I always will and sometimes things go well and sometimes they don't, and this is something I need to continue to address, but it certainly HAS helped, feeling better about myself!
I have really enjoyed teaching Literacy this year, and through things the kids, the TAs and people have said, AND the children's assessment results, this is something I feel I have done and developed particularly well, and engendered greater appreciation of reading, writing, vocabulary and environmental consciousness in my children.
My children have appreciated what I have done with them this year, which again has helped. (Oh and they loved THEIR story I wrote for them, which was pleasing!)
There are goals that I still need to work on, working on certain maths skills, balancing and getting things completed in time, but I do feel much more positive.
Staff meetings do still tend to scare me and make me feel I am doing it all wrong, but I have discovered this year, that most other people feel like that as well! The sense of responsibility and how much I am affecting these children's lives does overwhelm me sometimes, but all I can do is my best.
I have a new job-share this year. I am sure it will be fine. She is a nice, skilled lady and I think (hope) that working with her will make me become more organised. My fellow teachers do have this impression of me as being slightly disorganised and messy still (even though my planning and marking is always on time!)and I must address this.
So, here I am, at the end of two years as a teacher,feeling much more positive that this is something I will continue to do and enjoy more. Still, if you are in the habit, please pray that I will be able to do my best for my new kids and be happy and be able to maintain the correct balance in my life.
