It kind of surprises me how gloomy I have felt this September. Despite lots of very happy times over the summer, many really joyful excursions, the month just gone has felt hard. I feel absolutely ridiculous and awful saying that because I have a really, really blessed life, many opportunities and joys and this community here makes me very grateful for your support but somehow, I have felt a constant sense of gloom,particularly on my way to school, that I just CAN'T seem to account for. I love my job and I am lucky to have it plus the behaviour and attainment of the children so far has been excellent so I am not sure what it is other than perhaps the feeling of change and not feeling quite sure of my position and settled with a new Head and personnel. And they all, especially my Head, are very nice and GOOD people, so it's a silly feeling. I guess it's the harbringer of the cold weather, who knows? A lack of sleep- could be? I guess I'll snap out of it!
Thus I am endeavouring to do things that make me happy. Ha,
inspiration Monday this week features a tan hat! I naughtily bought a tan fedora 2 weeks ago in a 'I feel miserable after school, I'll just look in the shop' moment- it was the only one in the shop so I was glad to get my hands on it!
Alas, you get a grainy indoor shots and no denim jacket, though my polka dot blazer feels a bit like denim so this isn't too bad an interpretation I guess! Lots of colleagues and kids said...
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| Outfit featuring Tan fedora- Primark, heart-print shirt- White Stuff, Polka dot blazer- H&M via charity shop, heeled boots- Next Christmas sale, Trousers- ASOS, Collar clips- Flapperdoodle, earrings- market in France. |
Cute collar clips make me happy too. Wearing them twice in a row for work. Shame I seemed to have put them on wonky!
I can feel my inner blog-programmer being annoyed at two outfit posts in a row but couldn't be helped. Thus, here are a few other things have made me smile this week too:
1. Adorable Flapperdoodle packaging. This parcel contained a collection of cute cards and postcards.
2. A cool birthday present I got in February was this little tea-man who you open up to put tea-leaves in and sit him on the side of your cup with his arms over the side to hold himself there. A bit like Morph bathing in your tea!
3. When I asked CBC to make me some crackers and cheese too (he was making himself some), he used my favourite Tescos Deli Chilli oatcakes with goats cheese and then garnished them with radishes and coriander! Now that's what I call a chic snack! And excellent service!
4. A genius fundraising idea at church on Sunday for the church tower repairs. Selling takeaway tray portions of apple crumbles. Just enough for a generous portion for two! I'd buy it every week if they did it!
5. Admiring the Biscuiteers shop window in Nottinghill/Portobello road area. Who WOULDN'T want a London scene made out of biscuits with Superman biscuit flying over head.
6. ...Or indeed a whole plethora of onomatopoeic and superhero biscuits as a thank you present!
7. Inspirational quotes at St Peter's, Nottinghill in the kids room whilst changing for my orchestra concert.
8. Pretty coloured buildings in Portobello road.
9. Not-pictured- the school orchestra trying my arrangement of the WW1 soldier's song today and despite it having complicated rhythms and all seperate parts, they managed to sightread and play the entire thing and it sounded quite good in one session!
10. The KCO orchestra concert going well on Saturday. Didn't get nervous during my Belchazzar's feast flute solo (the 3rd movement is entirely flute solo) and it went well. Got complimented really genuinely and nicely by an LSO (London Symphony Orchestra) double bass player! Honestly, that made my day!
11. Finally, I played with the 1st Sunday worship band on Sunday at church- it's only the 3rd time I've done it and I really like them. I'm the oldest in the band- the others are all late 20's. On Sunday, I was feeling absolutely exhausted after a very late night and having to get up for church practice. We played various songs but the final hymn was
Be thou my vision, the modern 4/4 celtic rock beat version (
here's a good version) and we began from a pounding drum beat sung a cappella bar the drums and it built up through the 5 verses it getting louder and louder. The congregation really really sang out. By the end, as we finished, I felt myself on the verge of tears, but happy tears.
Be thou my vision, O Lord of my heart,
be all else but naught to me, save that thou art;
be thou my best thought in the day and the night,
both waking and sleeping, thy presence my light.
Be thou my wisdom, be thou my true word,
be thou ever with me, and I with thee Lord;
be thou my great Father, and I thy true son;
be thou in me dwelling, and I with thee one.
Be thou my breastplate, my sword for the fight;
be thou my whole armor, be thou my true might;
be thou my soul's shelter, be thou my strong tower:
O raise thou me heavenward, great Power of my power.
Riches I heed not, nor man's empty praise:
be thou mine inheritance now and always;
be thou and thou only the first in my heart;
O Sovereign of heaven, my treasure thou art.
High King of heaven, thou heaven's bright sun,
O grant me its joys after victory is won;
great Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
still be thou my vision, O Ruler of all.
Many things may serve to make us gloomy but there is always much of beauty, small moments, big moments, inspirational words, filling of the Spirit, a song, and occasionally a super-man biscuit that make the gloom dissipate!
xx
