What is this feeling of doom?

And so the holiday is almost at an end. I am clinging to the entrails of the holiday like rock-climber who has slipped off a precipice and is mustering up the last of their strength as they hang over a chasm.

But why, oh why, does it feel like this? I feel utterly wretched and doom-ridden.  My job is fine. I like my colleagues, generally like a lot of the children, like what I do, have a safe comfortable environment to work in.  I just have a very long commute as the only real negative.
And yet this ending of the Christmas beak feels like the end of the world.  I feel so gloomy and despondent over how I have used my holiday, regretting the work I have failed to do, the friends I failed to see, the tasks I meant to achieve. In my rational head, I know this is silly, that people work in treacherous conditions, some get only 20days of holiday a year (if that) and they have to juggle childcare, elderly relatives, other responsibilities and the suchlike.  I have none of that.  I KNOW it will be fine once I am back but just for now I am wallowing in a well of self-pity.  Woe is me! Silly, isn't it?!

Please tell me that other people feel this sense of doom upon returning to work, especially after Christmas and I am not some lonesome first-world problems brat (well I am that, but it would be nice to know it wasn't just me!)

I shall, of course, make sure I do some blessing counting to assuage these silly feelings, but in the meantime, goodnight!

xx

Recent doings

Watching: Doctor Who series 6 on DVD in the background whilst packing or working. Loving re-watching the series where we waited for the Doctor to die and finding out who River Song really is!!!!  Also watched Celebrity Sports relief Bakeoff this week and to my delight, our lovely wedding venue, Valentines Mansion, is the backdrop again! I kept squealing "Valentines!" as it appeared in the background!

Reading: a Biography of Queen Mary, the Queen's grandmother. Really interesting!!!

Planning: For moving next week. I abhor packing. I abhor packing by myself even more.

Also planning for next Christmas trip to South Africa to visit our friend. Well, I should be. Have booked a cleaner for the house as we go- I cannot be doing with scrubbing surfaces and vigorous hoovering. Now trying to find man with van.  Would you trust someone you found in an ad in the paper whose price seems really low?

Cooking: Delicious chickpea dish (post to come) and aubergines, also Butternut squash risotto. That was during the week though. This weekend, to be fair though, I've been eating left over Chinese takeaway (tofu, chicken and vermicelli) and chocolate eclairs from Friday night eked over 3 days- not eaten much else! That happens at the weekend.

Eating: The above. And a bag of Wotsits, some lentil crisps and not enough veg. Unusual for me.

Visiting: Pah,no where!!! Visited the post office to post my giveaway prize after finding where I buried it, dragged a suitcase of books a mile and a half to the charity shop (hoping air would help me get rid of headache) where the shop assistant didn't smile once! Seriously.  Was supposed to be visiting a lovely blogger evening at Lush with Gem, but my headache has been so awful, I couldn't feel up to it- the thought of walking the mile to the station, then getting a bus for 40 mins, then having to be cheerful and enthusiastic for an hour or so and then do the same in reverse.

Going: To school for work during the week and church for practice at 8.30am. Possibly going to my friend's garage to store some stuff that CBC will try and make me get rid of if we have no room for it in our smaller new house.

Celebrating: My birthday in 3 weeks. Other than that, diddly squat except it being the weekend!

*Idea for this post totally stolen from Bevchen at Confuzzledom. Apparently, I am quite obvious and honest about stealing. I danced into our business manager's office (which is next to the photocopy room) and sang outloud that I was stealing her scissors to open a box (thinking I was alone). As I went into the photocopy room, one of the deputy heads had appeared in there who laughed at my flagrant honesty at stealing. I then proceeded to cut open paper boxes with aforementioned stolen scissors and take out all the reams of paper and laid them neatly boxless so I could steal the boxes for transporting all my sheet music. I then travelled home on the train carrying home an enormous pile of boxes of varying size. Have been doing this all week. It is rather tiring.

Novelty bag: watering the plants

My husband frequently tells me I ruin a perfectly good outfit by teaming it with an unsuitable, unstylish or ill-matched bag.  I usually ignore him but occasionally he has a point- sometimes what I add doesn't really go AT ALL. It just looks incongruous.   I don't really care to be honest.  However, what I DO love is a statement, novelty handbag.  I absolutely LOVE novelty handbags.  The number around has surged recently and I've spied many fabulous bags.  Kate Spade has an amazing, very expensive selection (oh look, they've got a watering can for £240!), New Look and ASOS often have classics and other places.   Blogger, Char at T-rexes and tiaras has a classic collection of fun novelty bags as does Louise at Polka Dots and Freckle dots.  Both their collections are brilliant to look at. The ultimate collection must belong to Pink-haired Princess,  Gem but I can't seem to find a post with all of them in it- follow the link and you'll see them in different posts which I've selected.

My trouble with the majority of novelty bags (at least the affordable ones. Irregular Choice have good sizes but too expensive) are the fact they are just TOO small for me.  I just couldn't buy them because I couldn't fit anything in them!  I would LOVE to own most of the ones around but since I feel the need to hoik the kitchen sink and several tons of garbage around with me on a regular basis, they just don't work.  It's like I am allergic to just carrying the essentials.  Any time I've tried to use a small clutch, I've ended up taking a second larger bag to contain all the other miscellanea that I can't fit in the first one.  CBC looked at me at a wedding last summer and said "WHY have you got TWO bags, Kezzie!?!?!?!?" - one small delicate one, bulging at the seams and a secondary sack with everything that woudn't fit in the first one! Yes, I somewhat spoilt the delicate look with having 2 bags! You shouldn't really add luggage to wedding photos really!

I am, I confess,a veritable bag lady, rather like the old hag from Labyrinth who carries round the world with her.

Anyway, that was supposed to be a short preamble into the main point.  I acquired this rather fun novelty bag a while ago, just before the start of Lent and the shopping ban/fast for Lent.  I'd seen it some years ago in Octopus and always wanted one.  The good thing is it fits a book, camera, phone, large purse, hand sanitizer, oyster card etc etc so it passes muster on the novelty + capacity test! I can survive with this.


I've been swapping between various handbags but decided it was time to give the watering can its outing. I look forward to the children's reaction tomorrow.
 At some point, I'll share the few other novelty bags I have, but for now- Tschuss!

See you all soon.
xxx

10 reasons I am a Doctor Who geek

Since the last few blog swaps I've taken part with have resulted in my receiving some Doctor Who memorabilia, it's safe enough to assume that you blog lot get that I like Doctor Who.  However, in the interests of entertainment (never let it be said that I do not pass up an opportunity to let you poke fun at me!), I thought I'd share a few Doctor Who anecdotes about me.

1. Did I ever mention that I once owned over 100 VHS videos of vintage Doctor Who episodes? Alas, I got rid of most of them about 3-4 years ago when I was having to move house. I was made to freecycle them and I regret greatly, their loss. It all began from a Christmas present from my older sister who bought me a TARDIS tin containing 3 videos of A Trial of a Time Lord when I was about 14.  This amazing video shop opened in Ilford and they had brand new Doctor Who videos on sale for £2.99 each. Considering they cost £9.99 in WH Smith etc, this was amazing and so I began building a collection and was bought others for subsequent Christmases/Birthdays.

2. I wrote two letters to Doctor Who magazine (which I subscribed to) and both of which were published/printed. Oh, and both of them were basically my 14 year old self declaring my love for Paul McGann! DWM published a  picture of McGann in a heart next to the former one.

3.  I can probably quote most of the Paul McGann movie... Ahem..."It was on the planet Skaro that my old enemy the master was finally put on trial. They say he listened calmly as his list of evil deeds was read and the sentence passed.  Then he made his last, and I thought somewhat curious, request. He demanded that I, The Doctor, a rival timelord should take his remains back to our home planet, Gallifrey. It was a request that they should NEVER have granted..." Cue theme music.  (It was that movie which made me like Doctor Who again.)

4.  I attended a Doctor Who convention, Panopticon, in 1996.  I was about 15 and I booked a coach to Coventry for the day, wore my friend's Cricket jumper, got loads of autographs and had a generally wonderful time!! I met 4 Doctors that day, copious companions and a myriad Daleks!

5.  I used to buy the BBC's new novels as they came out in the late 90's.  They have long-gone but again, I wish I still had them.

6. The fact I am writing this post!

7.  My very first year of teaching, one of my favourite pupils bought me a Sonic Screwdriver and psychic paper set as an end of year present. And I was DELIGHTED.

8.  Likewise, during my PGCE year, my pupils bought a poster of Rose and the Doctor for me, mounted it on paper and decorated it with tissue paper flowers. It went up on my 25 year old adult's wall for a good 3 years!

9. I own a 10foot long stripy scarf. And was bought a question mark tanktop for Christmas some years ago- alas it was huge and looked awful!!! And yes, I may have been slightly influenced by Clara Oswald when I bought a some various lots of items in my wardrobe. And then there's the Dalek dress...

10. If you insult Doctor Who, I will scratch your eyes out ;-) mwa ha ha!!!

Thought I'd approach TARDIS Tuesday in a different way this time!
( If you are not a Who-fan, please let me assure you, this type of thing doesn't happen too often, please don't unfollow for me being too eccentric!!!)



Linking to TARDIS Tuesday with Maricel